Words cannot describe the incredible pain that Mother's Day brings. As another year rolls by, Mother's Day to me is a sad reminder of what I have lost. I am unable to participate in the festivities that the day brings, nor share it with my own mother, as selfish as that is.
I urge anyone else in my situation to talk about your feelings. Instead of doing this I let the grief consume me. I am not proud of the person I was then or how I handled things. There is so much about that time in my life I would change if I could, but I can't click my fingers and go back in time. I am so open about NF because of what I have learnt from my mistakes of the past. I do hope that one day I will be able to embrace Mothers Day like I do so many others things. Instead, for the moment, the day is a reminder that my baby lives on in my heart and not in my arms.